Days of My Life

Talk about daily life of a teenage girl in Iraq, and days of suffering and success. My nick name will be Sunshine..

Saturday, August 26, 2006

My news summary....

Hi all , my computer didn’t work and I had to leave it in my relative’s house for couple days to fix the problem.
At that time I stayed with my grandma’s sister . She had a minor surgery and needed someone to take care of her , she has only one daughter and she is in her honeymoon , so I spent two days with her .
After that I went to laylat al henna for some friend , I had so much fun , as they are Kurds , I dressed clothes similar to theirs ( chiffon and satin with so many colors and beads , and of course many golden jewelries ) , they danced Dabkah (my favorite kind of dance) , I had a nice time .
After that in 2 days I went to my neighbor’s wedding , it was hot but I had fun .
In the mornings , I teach my next door neighbor how to use computer and internet , even if we don’t have electricity , because they have large generator.
I spend the afternoon making handmade work , and I am learning how to play on my mom’s musical keyboard, I didn’t buy one for my own yet , because we don’t have fuel to go to the market .
I have continues headache these days, maybe because there are so many things in my mind that make me worried .
Those are my update news ,

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

New swimming pool ...

Hello friends,
in the absence of security , fuel , and electricity , we always try to do something fun to kill the time . We have a small swimming pool, where Mariam and Yosif spend most of the day time in. I really like to swim with them, but it is very small, about 150 cm in diameter!!!! Today the temperature was 50 C , I felt sooo hot .while my sister and brother were swimming, I put my feet in the water and then started to walk saying " I wish I fell down in water " my mom and sis surrounded me and wetted me with water , Yosif said " please honey , swim with us " Yosif and I swam , then he felt bored and left the pool ,but I remained in it and had my lunch their, while all the family sat beside the pool. It is great to have lunch inside water , we sat in the garden at 2 : 00 pm , because the temperature out side is much cooler than inside the house !!!!!.
Then my sister and I caught the flexible hose and started to chase each other , the funniest thing is that my grandpa came from work and we wetted him with water , he started to laugh and said "stop , there's money in my pocket ,my mobile phone , and important papers " but it was too late .
Mama saw how much we had fun , and she told daddy when he came home that she want to buy us a bigger swimming pool from a near by shop , he said " ok , I'll pray the afternoon prayer then go and buy one ".
At 6:00 pm mama and daddy came with a very big swimming pool , I was so happy , I spent the greatest afternoon ever , I didn't have fun like that long time ago , daddy , mama , grandpa , sister , brother and I swam together , and played many water games . I had marvelous time with my family especially with my father, our relationship is much better (we didn't fight since June).
I spent one of the best days in my life.
(Thank you my government for giving me the opportunity to spend more time with my family !)………….

Friday, August 11, 2006

Iraqis are mollycoddles !!!

Do you know that our government spoils us very much?.
You must be wondering how!!!
Well, in summer our caring beloved government does not give us electricity to allow us have free Sauna!!! They want us to be slim, to be fit and healthy.

The government doesn't offer fuel to the generators to reduce the pollution in the air! And to protect us from the generators noises, they want us to sleep well so as to wake up in the next morning to be CODDLED MORE.
The government doesn't offer fuel for the cars, in order to lessen pollution and car accidents. In this way they make us do walking sport, to work and school, I even had to walk from the hospital gate to the emergency room, when I was sick. walking is very useful and healthy sport as you know..
The government doesn't control the situation, but impose stroll bans during the night and sometimes during the day, because they want us to spend more time with our families and hence improve our relationships. The government make us leave our homes and neighborhoods (when the situations get worse) to allow us visit our relatives and spend few days with them.

The government doesn't make a strong and serious plan to catch the terrorists who kidnap Iraqis, because our lovely government wants us to live real adventures!!
The government doesn't give us passports easily, because they don't want us to spend our money randomly in a foreign country.
The government doesn't offer electricity for our heaters in winter, to make us feel like we live in Alaska while we are in our homes.
The government doesn't offer oil for our Sopas (kind of heaters in Iraq work by oil) because they want us to breathe fresh air.

The government doesn't offer gas for the cookers, because they care about our health, they want us to eat fresh food, fruit and vegetable, and to avoid fires that occur because of gas leak.
The government doesn't offer medicines to hospitals, because they want us to use the herbs, it is better than medicines and don't contain poisons!!
The government lies (I couldn't find the wisdom behind that, probably because of my young age, but I trust my government's good judgment).
The government doesn't stop this chaos , because they want us to experience new things all the time such as mines , bombing cars , bombing animals as donkeys (once the terrorists bombed a donkey in a market) , bombing human beings!!!! , and if someone died because the explosion, it is ok , we should believe that it 's his/her destiny , and of course they would APPRECIATE that ,because they might go to heaven or to hell (and even hell is better than Iraq ).
The government coerces the girls to wear scarfs and Abayas, to revive our folklore that is why some politicians wear (turbans and Dishdasha).
The government steals money, to improve the economy! But I can not understand how!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
The government doesn't offer jobs for it's citizens , because WE ARE SPOILED.
In the past Iraq was unknown country, but now we became famous as we became the first line news, so we became spoiled and famous at the same time.
the government doesn't spoil it self, how? In the other hand
They have electricity all the time, to sleep well, and wake up astir early, to serve the Iraqi people and spoil them of course.
They get very high salaries to pay high TAXES!!!!
I know that we live like that for a wise purpose, but I wish we can make a Life – Swap with our beloved government.


Does your governments spoil you like that ? I am sure 1000000000% that my government is extraordinary.
Now, my biggest fear is that you feel jealous.
When my mom call grandma and tell her "I can't bear this life anymore" my grandma replay "you must, may be god is TESTING us, to see our faith and ability to bear ". Once my mom replied "OK, BUT, I WANT TO GRADUATE MA"….!!!

The Spoiled citizen, Sunshine

Monday, August 07, 2006

Cloudy days .....

The circumstances that we (the Iraqis) live in, makes us expecting bad news at any time, or something bad will happen soon, even me!!! I never imagined myself as a pessimist, but the hard conditions make me act in a different way.
And whenever the phone rings, my heart beats hard, particularly at night after I hear bad news all day long. Especially in these days as the situation is getting worst here.
Few days ago, I was working on computer when my mom returned from her work, she was coming up the stairs, and I heard her uncle's name and kidnappers ..?! I left the computer promptly, and went to see what was going on.
17 well-armed terrorists wanted to kidnap uncle M , thank god he wasn't at work at that time( he work in a pharmacy as an assistant) , I wonder what did they want , money ?! he is not rich!! .The bad guys banged the pharmacist( a pregnant woman) as well as her husband to make them admit where uncle M was , and they also banged a man in the street waiting for his wife who was in the ultrasound clinic, because his descriptions were similar to uncle , the terrorists did not know uncle M in person, a passing by friend heard what happened and warned uncle , who left the house immediately with his family..
I was very worried about them , he has 6 children and wife , his financial condition is not good , that's why he work in two jobs from 6 am till the stroll bans ( at 9:30 pm)although he has serious heart problems, , but he has a supportive loving family .
we called him , he sounded horrified, but he said they were in a safe place , the terrorists in somehow got his mobile phone No, phoned him ,threatened him and extorted him for money , as he didn't have that money my grandpa assured him that all the family would pay for him " we will bring you the money even if we must sell our cars, & our houses, there is nothing more important than your safety , don't think about money at all , the money will be in your hands as soon as possible ".
I was really worried about our safety specially my grandpa and father, some times the terrorists kidnap the relatives of their prey too…
Whenever the phone rings , we stand still, , it is too hard to live in a country with the absence of security, you live in paradise guys .
After few days from this bad shocking news, my dad's phone rang at 11:30 pm, he got a message "call on this number now". My dad said
"should I call or just ignore the message?" my mom and I said " CALL " we didn't say anything for few seconds, and many horrible stories and thoughts came to my mind at that time, it was the longest 10 seconds in my life, the phone rang , and someone was shouting "CALL THE NUMBER THAT WAS MENTIONED IN THE MESSAGE NOW " and he shot the phone.
Dad made the call from the kitchen.

When he came back, my mom and I asked quickly "WHAT?"
He said " it is just the guard from work, he couldn't operate the generator and he wanted me to call him so that he won't loose money"..
I got mad, I thought they are kidnapers or bad guys "Idiot , stupid guard what would happen if he lost 9 cents " I said .
And I started to laugh as well as mama and we told each other about our thoughts at that time.
My thoughts were: (how much money will they ask for , should we sell the cars , or our golden jewelry , do we have that much of money , what if they will hurt my dad , what will happen if they want too much money that we can't offer, of course my grandparents will pay with us too. )
My mom' thoughts were: someone died or kidnapped, problems in work, what does this person want?"…
Oh , all the Iraqis need psychological counselor , and to spend the rest of their live in a resort as well ,

Friday, August 04, 2006

Eight days in Sunshine's life .

Hello friends , I wrote my diary for Eight days ,
Friday 21/7/2006
9:00 am : I woke up after I spent one of the worst summer nights, hot weather with no electricity at all , with many nightmares , oh….. my mood is really terrible , and I am very nervous ( I become nervous when I don't sleep well )…..
9:30 am: I had my breakfast and I'm more relaxed now , my father's uncle just arrived my house , he visits us every Friday morning .
10:00 my relative just left, we were talking about the fuel and the high prices (normal Iraqi talk !!)
11:40 am : my dad and I cleaned the house , because my mom had an asthma attack ,it is the first time I see my dad doing the house cleaning the way he catch the mop is so funny! I have electricity now so I'll go and read my E-mails .
11:50 am : I hear shooting , there is something wrong in my neighborhood today!!….
21:10 pm: the electricity is off now , I had 20 mails, I'll go to read Anne of green gables book now , while listing to Radio Sawa .
12:40 pm: there is a heavy shooting again, it is the second time today.
1:20 pm : my friend H ( 16 years old ) phoned me , she invited me to her house at 6 pm, we are not in the same school , and we didn't see each other for 5 months , I am so excited , she will borrow some books from me ( a bullet in the head , the ghost , a murder in the airplane , the silent witness , & Asmahan and the British intelligence ) , I shall also teach her how to make macramé and to spin with beads , and she will teach me the appliqué.
3:30 pm: I had my lunch and drunk a delicious Iraqi tea I started to tell jokes to kill the time and make my family more relaxed during the absence of the electricity, and now I will go back to my book.
5:00 pm : I finished reading now , and I am going to prepare and change my clothes , I'm so excited .
6:00 pm : ready to go .
8:20 pm :I just came back and had lots of fun we talked a lot , the funniest thing that they had guests and their house is too small ( 2 bedrooms and one guestroom and a living room , they are 10 people in the house ,my friend sleep in the living room with her 2 brothers and 2 sisters , her mom and dad in a room and the other one is for her married brother , his wife and 2 daughters !!!) their financial condition is not good although there are 1 dentist , 2 doctors , 2 teachers , the other two boys work though they are studying in collages , they work in a shop as sellers .
" B" my friend's sister-in-low felt sorry for us , so that she allowed us to go to her room.
"B" lost her uncle , 2 cousins and her uncles wife last week in a bombing car , god bless their souls .
10:00 pm : I feel bored we don't have electricity , I am writing under torch's light , I'll join my family in the garden now .
Saturday 22/7/2006.
10:40 am , I wake up an hour ago , organized the house and beds , prepared the breakfast , and I'll start my day in reading .
12:30 pm : my mom came back from her work , and I have electricity now , WOW .
1:30 pm , the power is off , I wrote a post and published it , I also published some pictures .
2:00 pm : I had my lunch , I am thinking about my exams' results , I am nervous and worried but anxious in the same time .
2:10 pm: My father's uncle phoned us, he said that a car was bombed near their house, they are all ok, but there windows were broken and many chops were fallen in their garden .
3:00 pm : my mom and I were trying to find names for Rose's child, I found 8 till now..
10:00 pm , I wasn't in a good mood to write , I had three hours electricity , and I wasted 2 hours trying to publish pictures but I couldn't , I had sooooo slow services , which drove me crazy and I started to cry at the end , I had many mixed feelings, I was worried about my results, upset ,& angry from the internet company , my mom took me out from the house to some nearby relatives', I played a game " Fighting game " to feel better , their son tough me how to play basketball and it's rules , we caught butterflies from their garden….
I don't have electricity so I will spend the evening in the garden ..
Sunday 23/7/2006
10:00 pm : I woke up an hour ago , my mom didn't go to work , she went to apply a request for MSc study, I sent to her prof( he is also a family friend) a present , it's a copy of my assay for the contest of the American Islamic congress that I participated in , he felt so happy , our internet company sent an engineer to fix the internet problem we have .
3:00 pm: Najma's mom invited us to there house tomorrow and I am afraid that my dad won't be able to get us fuel (as it is not available and is very expensive in the black market), ….
3:30 pm: I am reading I'll finish the book tomorrow
5:30 pm : I stopped reading now , ready to go to my relative's house ..
10:00 pm : I went to my relative house , we did some shopping , I came back 2 hours ago , and watched Dr. Phil show, I had my supper while working on computer , I published a new post, read and replied many E-mails , I also typed my diary for the past three days , I hope the generator's operator will give us power , I want to see " Brat camp " he doesn’t give us power during the night at all , and only few hours during the day with very low voltage that I can't even work on computer .
I saw in TV an announcement says that our results are tomorrow, I can't wait.
11:30 my relative just phoned she got my marks, wow; I am the first one in Mosul who knows her results!!!! , my marks are good I have one mark not very good (85 in physics ), and I got 96 in Arabic , I can't believe it I thought I'll get 85 !!!!!!! , I am happy my par is 94 % and it's good for my hard circumstances , the hot weather and the absence of electricity, I got 91 in Geography and History , although I couldn't study history when I was in the emergency room and my mom read the geography for me , I'll go to sleep with so much relief.
Monday 24/7/2006
11:00 pm : I woke up an hour ago , my brother kept jumping over my bed I feel mad as I still feel sleepy ,I couldn't sleep because of the hot night.
When I opened my eyes my grandma was there and said:
-" I called the headmistress"
-"Yes?! "
- "your friend's par is higher than yours "..
-" I am ok with my par"
- "when" S" was in your age, 3 years ago, her par was higher ……"
- " so what?! , I don't care , at all "
Then I left the room and took a shower.
I know I didn't get the highest par , but I studied well and was happy in my par , but now , I am confused , and upset
2:30 pm : tears didn't leave my eyes , I'd never been sad and pessimistic the way I feel right now ,
my mom came back from her work feeling so happy she bought Pepsi for the doctors , workers and patients too!!!! For my success , hehehe , and when she saw me she said " I was expecting seeing you jumping and dancing , 94 % is not a low par , it is very high , you should be proud , don't care about what your father and grandma says , if you took 99% they would say why not 100% ?"
I felt better after that conversation, and from now and then I shall be proud of my par ..
3:00 pm , I checked my E-mails, I had 24 mail from my readers telling me that they can't wait till I publish my marks , I was so happy to read that .
8:00 pm: I just came back from Najma's house and I had fun with her, Hnk, and their friend Z. we talked a lot, and had grate time,
11:30 pm : I didn't have power , so I spent the afternoon in the garden ..
Tuesday 25/7/2006
12:00 pm : I woke up 3 hours ago , cleaned and organized the house , we are excepting guests today, I am so excited .
2:00 pm : I'm going to read now .
5:00 pm , I finished the first book of Anne of green gables series , and now I'll go to change my clothes and my brother's .
6:00 pm : my relatives will arrive in a couple of minutes, I can't wait.
8:30 pm : my relatives just left the house , we had fun together , first we were talking about their daughter marriage (will be on 3/8/2006 ), the party , cake , wedding dress etc , I had fun , then we started to talk about fuel , electricity , security , kidnapping , killing , etc , as I always say it's the ordinary Iraqi talk !!!!
12:00 pm: sorry for not covering my diary, but I didn't have electricity , and I spent the time in the garden .
Wednesday 26/7/2006
6:00 am , I AM MAD , I woke up because it is hot and we don't have electricity , I'm very sleepy , and nervous , I slept for 4 hours only. Why should I spend the night with out even a fan, while the electricity minister sleeps comfortably with his air-conditioner on?!!!!
1:30 pm : at 9:30 am I heard my brother Yosif , crying so I went trying to put him in bed , but I slept in his bed!!!!! And he woke up, I woke up again at 11:30, Yosif and I played in our small pool, and had a great time.
5:00 pm : I slept in the time between 3-5 and now I'll go to change my clothes and prepare the house , my relatives will come after 1 hour .
When I woke up , my mom told me that my neighbor " A" was kidnapped , I got shocked , and couldn't believe that , why would someone kidnap him ? he is not political , he don’t work with the US troops nor any political association , he is not a doctor nor an engineer nor a Pharmacist ,as they are reasons to be kidnapped in my country!!! , "A" is an ordinary and loved guy , all the neighbors love him , his father died and he take care of his 26 brothers ,sisters , his nephews and nieces , and his very old sick mom , she has heart attack , hypertension , and diabetes ." A" is a 38 years old father of 3 children (5, 9, 11), I pray that the kidnapers will free him soon .
8:30 pm : my relatives just left the house , I had a nice time , their son(24 years old ) borrowed 2 books from me ( country come-up and country come-down , and a very old book explain the English grammar) , and I showed him most of my books , he liked them , he knows that I like to read but it is the first time he sees my lovely library , we also talked about one of my favorite books " the body language ", (it's an amazing book, I read it more than 4 times ) , about Helen Killer , Jane Aer and many books .
It is really nice to find someone share you the same interests.
12:30 am; the kidnapers send SMS message saying " he is with us and fine . Do not call the police " .. Now I will go to sleep .
Thursday 27/7/2006
10:00 am : I woke up and had my breakfast , my mom switch on our generator , we don't do that often , because we have no fuel , I will work on internet , answer my E-mails , and type my diary, I didn't type my diary for the last 3 days we didn't have electricity .
12:00 pm : my mom finished working on computer at 10:30 and then It was my turn, I had many letters , I read them . I wrote ,sent 6 letters , and typed my diary, my mom is calling me , there's a nice show , she said , and I don't know what to choose computer or the nice show ?!.
12:30 pm : I saw a gorgeous show today , called " grease mania" , oh , I would love to go for one time in my life to a show like that , I love those kind of shows , I like the circuses , panoramas , any show contain music , dancing , & singing .
I just see them in TV, my mom is lucky she traveled when she was a kid to Denmark and to west Germany , she saw a real play city , zoo , beach, and things I can't even imagine , It is my dream to go out side Iraq , and may be visit Disney !!!!!! , will it be possible?? I am not very sure.
2:00 pm : I'll go to read now .
6:00 pm : I read for a while then called my friend "R" ( she lost 2 uncles , 2 cousins , her aunt's husband , and her father ), R took the highest mark in the class , I am so happy for her , now my mom , dad , Yosif will go to the photography , then to a library , my grandpa and Mariam went to our relative's house , and I am staying home with my grandma ..
8:00 pm : Good news , I am looking through the window , my neighbor just freed , my grandpa was in the street and saw him in the car , "A" stopped the car and hugged my grandpa , all the neighbors , his brothers , nephews, family , and son are running in the street , his brothers are crying (tears of happiness) , and his son is carrying a balloon , they are hugging him , it's very emotional view , and I am so happy .
at 7 : pm my mom went to their house , they told her that A was with his brothers , friends , and son when he was kidnapped , all of the men sprawled on the floor while the terrorists pointed their guns toward them,, except his 10 years old son , A's partner cough him form his arm trying to stop this kid from running to free his dad , he wasn't thinking about the guns nor the terrorists , he was shooting at them to leave his dad , thank god the terrorists didn't kill him , ( I heard that a 14 years old guy shot the terrorist in order to save his dad , the terrorists killed his dad and throw him in the street ) those terrorists are heartless.
12:00 I didn't have electricity so I went to the garden, we heard a loud explosion behind my house, and we ran to the house , I can smell the fume ( a lorry burned because of a mine ) , I can't breath well the house smells Smokey .
Friday 28/7/2006
12:00 pm : I woke up at 9 am , had my breakfast as fast as I could , we had electricity, I worked on computer for an hour and half , then the power was off , so I cleaned the house with Mama, organized and cleaned my room , and now I am in the living room with the family
02:00 pm , I was searching in my grandparents' library , and I found a dictionary , wonderful one ( English-English ) , I thought all of those books are about engineering , but I was wrong . No one touched those books for years, they are old and dusty .
I took a peace of clothes and started to clean them ( to read the books' names ) , my grandma told me to take any book I like , I took many ( here is the answer / learn Turkish / the Jewish's mores / & the stars , people , and the atom ). I am so happy.
4:00 I am typing my diary, now, and will go to my relative's house.
8:30 , I came back from my relative's house , their daughter finished the sixth class, but her par is 76 % , so they were so upset.. My mom went to our neighbor's house , to congratulate them for A's safety , and I went to the garden with the rest of the family , we played with water , then we heard a VERY heavy near by shooting , and ran to the house , I was going to fall down as there was water on the floor , but my grandpa caught me , as I hit the door , but I am alive with simple bruises in my arm and back, our electricity is good , we had power for three hours , Yes , I can't believe that .
11:00 I saw a fantastic show on TV 5 (it's a French channel) and I kept saying, "do you want me to translate what they are talking about ??!!" Hehehehe
I had fun , I wish I can go to a show like that , one day ..
I found my relative online , I'd never met him ,he is in my age , and I had so much fun , I asked him about his family, life , & school , it is the first time I talk to him , I don't remember him when he was in Iraq , he went to Oman when he was 5 I guess , but he remembers me , I am so grateful for the internet ..
1:30 am , we had an awful sandstorm , and my asthma is bad , I can't take a breath , I'll go to sleep now , I am so excited my relative's wedding is next Thursday, and my other relative's wedding is so soon too .
It is the last day of my diary , I had so much fun and felt like a reporter, although I was very upset and worried about my exams this week, but I hope you'll enjoy my diary .