Days of My Life

Talk about daily life of a teenage girl in Iraq, and days of suffering and success. My nick name will be Sunshine..

Friday, February 17, 2006

Crying instead of shining .........

Hello all , it has been a very bad week for me ,I spent my mid year holiday in Baghdad , I had a nice time there ,my mom didn't have a surgery (they postponed it) , & I was a babysitter for two days!!! My way to Baghdad was ok, but my way back to Mosul was terrible I spend NINE hours in the unpaved roads... we came back to Mosul as soon as we could because my grandma's mom died during her surgery.
When I reached home I received a call from my friend, she was rather sad, I asked her if there was anything wrong:
- is there anything wrong?
- I am afraid that our friend R lost her Dad
- What? How? Why? When?!
- I don't know
- Who told you?
- I knew that from a friend
- did you contact with her in the holiday?
- No
I ended the call hoping that it is a nightmare, or there is a mistake…
I went to my room & my eyes were full with tears, I called my friends and they said that it's true she lost her Dad but they didn't know how or when.
After 10 minutes I received an SMS from my friend saying " I knew that R's Dad was murdered " I drooped my book from my hand , & cried a lot , I was thinking why would someone kill him ? what was his guilt ?, he is an engineer, not a policemen , nor from the national guards , he don't cooperate with any political gathering , & he isn't rich , as these are the reasons behind killing nowadays…..
I told my mom about that and she was shocked too.
When I calmed down & stopped crying, I decided to call R…
but I couldn't control my emotions , I tried so hard to be strong , but unfortunately I failed , we had this conversation :
- Hello, R, how are you?
- Hi
- I heard about your Dad, is that true?
- Yes, it is
- I am truly sorry for your loss
- Thanks, me too…
- What happened?
- My uncle came to stay with us for few days ,( he lives in Sad Al -Mosul near the dam's lake, an area about 40 kilometers to the north of Mosul ) , when he decided to go back to his home , my dad wanted to spend the weekend in my uncle's house . He decided to go with my uncle, my dad in his car, with my cousin who needed a lift to his collage.
My dad went & told my uncle to wait for him near the university so they can drive together , after my uncle put his stuff in the car he went to catch my dad , in the road he heard shooting , but he didn't know what was going on first , after he came nearer he saw a car with men wearing black clothes shooting towards my dad's car ,then ran away, my uncle ran to my dad's car , but it was tooo late , he saw my dad & my cousin died , he called the hospital & they sent him an ambulance . Then he went to my big uncle's house first & explained to him what happened, he came to us & said that my dad & cousin are injured, but they didn't die... he took my mom to my big uncle's house , where there was a family meeting , & I stayed at home with my brothers & sisters , my aunt picked me to my uncle's house noon , I knew that there is something wrong from her eyes , I asked her to tell me the truth , she said " your dad & cousin died this morning "
- May Allah bless their souls.
- we had the solace in my uncle's house because ours is very small, & on the third day of the solace my mom needed some stuffs from our house, my uncle went to bring them, but he was late, so my other uncle went to see if there is anything wrong, he saw him laying near his car, & there was blood on his body, he ran to him but he was murdered , we lost three people from my family in 4 days .it was shocking for us all ….
- You will be ok, I know you are brave
- I hope so, you will come to school tomorrow, right?
- Yes, & what about you?
- Yes I will
- Ok, bye
- Bye, I'll see you tomorrow
(Btw our solace last for 3 days)
My dad felt sad when he heard that, because R's dad was his class mate at collage ….
R is one of the intelligent pupils in my class , she always get high marks & she is loved by everyone , she have 6 uncles , 5 brothers & sisters : a 4 years old girls twins , another 7 years old boy twins & her sister is 12 years old , & of course "R "she is 15 … her mom is a teacher .
The teacher's salary is not high , that makes me wonder if she (R's mom) can offer a good life for 6 children. How can she pay for the bills? Buy clothes from them & feed them? How can she pay for the medicines? Buy the school stuffs, like bags, clothes, & stationeries? Their mom can't pay for that, with her low salary (157000 ID, about 105 $!!)As you know life here is very expensive??
My friend R have so many ambitions she want to be a doctor, I pray that she can achieve her dreams...
On the next day she came to school, we finished our classes & stayed in the classroom, the girls were talking and she was very sad, suddenly she left, do you know why? a girl got low marks and said " my dad will reproof me " R began to cry, we all went to her trying to calm her down, I controlled my feelings, & didn't cry, but not everyone could, they asked me to talk to her, as I was the brave one among them!!!, I talked to her and told her about my relative's story, (my mom wrote about that in her post "what was his guilt? " ) But when she said "what I will do with those high marks, my dad is gone , I wish I got low marks & return him back instead….. I pray to god to protect your dad & mom", at that time I couldn't control my tears at all , it is hard to do that when you see someone you love is really hurt because of losing someone close …..
That made me think to improve my relationship with my dad , as you know we have bad relationship ,at that night I kissed him ,gave him a hug & wished him a good night, for the first time since a long time , I think he wondered why ???!!!!
I pray god to protect us all, & bless R & her family ….
Crying Sunshine …
Btw, I got 97% in English for the second time I will try to get higher.