Days of My Life

Talk about daily life of a teenage girl in Iraq, and days of suffering and success. My nick name will be Sunshine..

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Unfairness is better than mercy !!!!!!!!!!...

I've talked a lot about the changes that happened in our life since war began, non of them shows the democracy and freedom..
Before war, there weren't any differences between Shiites and Sunnis, actually I didn't even know to which cast do I belong to!
But unfortunately our government is trying to make huge differences between us, so the two casts start to feel jealous, hate and hurts each other but Shiites and Sunnis have been living together for thousands of years and even married each other!!!.
Few days ago the students in Iraq got the marks of the ministerial exams, the most important exam in our life which will specify our future career..
To the great surprise for the students the marks were so unfair and low, I got 85.8 % and I am so lucky many are envying me!!
Every year about 60 students from my school join medicine, pharmacy and dentistry collages, their makes are higher than 90% but this year only 33 passed the exams !!!!!!!!!! only five from our class took marks in 90es ! it is insane.
With teary eyes and shock, I took a look in the web and saw that in some schools only 7 or 8 students passed the exams and in other schools in my city NO ONE passed the exams ..I started to wonder why ?
My friend called me crying also "there must be a huge mistake, no one we know took a high par" my friend said. The phone kept ringing, and no one was believing the crazy situation, most of the intelligent students who had 98 or 97 as final pars before the ministerial exams , failed, they'll have to repeat the 6th grade, others had 60% only or so, everyone was speechless!!
My lecturers in private classes and school teachers still believe I deserve 95% or so, but in the same time they say I must thank god because I passed, my physics teacher said his student which is a genius girl failed in 6 subjects "they didn't even mark her paper, they said she was absent in 6 exams but she attended them and answered well" he said .. I kept hearing such tragic stories
In Anrbar, Mosul, Diala, al Aa'thamya the marks were so unfair, in Anbar the ministry didn't mark the papers for 27 exam sectors, and decided to re-exam them, in A'athamyia the marks are worse than in everywhere else, students with their parents, professors started to demonstrate, one of the parents said "if they say the people in the south are more clever and they deserve the high marks they got, well I demand the minister to bring the student who took the highest marks to compete with my daughter, she is so clever, it is unfair she got very low marks" ..
but don't you notice that all of these places are for Sunnis ??
Everyone knows that the students are the victims of politicians disputes.
Each year, Mosul , Baghdad, and Hela, have the best ratio of success and high marks, unlike this year .
Now the iraqi media talks about our marks the whole time, even deputies, because the government is revenging from Sunnis.. governors, and important parties are demanding to re-mark our papers ..
Before we get the marks, I saw an interview with the person who's responsible of the ministerial exams and the marking in Dijla TV , he said " Karbal and Diwania have the best results ever, the students are busy with studying in these places, unlike those in other cities who are busy with other things beside school" and added " I ask the students not to be nervous, if they won't have high marks, so what, they can repeat the 6th class ones and twice and three times till they get it well " and then he added that during Saddam's rule the students in the south didn't take as high marks as they deserve, and now justice was settled!!
Well I don't see any justice ..
I felt sooo angry, the students in the north and middle are the cleverest but I kept watching with my heart beating fast and reminding myself he is just a bad person who's trying to part the iraqis ..
Then he said "there were some mistakes in the questions, but the humans make mistakes, we phoned SOME cities and corrected the questions "
At that time I was unable to continue the interview, I knew the marking will be unfair, my grandma was watching tv and crying, I said "grandma, what shall I do, the government is revenging from the Sunni students" ..
Then on Saturday I saw an interview with the minister he repeated three times that the students in the south have always been the best.

The huge difference between the students' marks in different Iraqi cities made the iniquitousness so evident..
one of the students got his marks and immediately had heart stroke because of the shock. it is so devastating to study so hard despite the dangerous situation, walk for long time in such hot weather in order to reach lectures when there's curfew, attend the exams, answer well, and then get so unexpected marks, WHY??
It is such a horrible government ,during Saddam's regime, who was dictator and despot ,the punishment of skulduggery in the ministerial questions, like selling them, or skulduggery in marking , the punishment was execution. when it comes to ministerial exams the rules were firm at his days. ..
For our government I'd like to say something:
I studied and prepared for the 6th grade so well, 16 months, at least 5860 hours of studying (12 hours per day, I usually study from 11 to 14 hours everyday) I tried to concentrate in spite of the hard situation, losing dear people, explosions and shooting, I did everything I could, I studied under the stairs during fights, my house was damaged for SEVEN times but I didn't give up ,I studied with chaos around me, I remember all the times I studied in the darkness till late time at night and used candles' light or torches, I walked for hours to reach the lectures at 2 pm while the temperature was more than 50 degrees, I didn't complain about carrying my books and searching for a room to study, as we closed all of the windows with wood because of the continuous explosions, I didn't care about the cold weather when the temperature in under zero degrees, or the hot weather in summer, I said, impossible in nothing for me, after all the suffering all I am asking you is to give us the result we deserve, based on our efforts and cleverness, not our cast or religions ..
Shiite or Sunni, I am Iraqi, and I'll rebuild Iraq in the future, if you like or not, I will not give up, my religion and cast doesn't matter, because I have a clear heart and unconditional love to Iraq, god will change what you damaged, we'll be great doctors, engineers and professors, it is right you didn't gave the Sunnis the marks they deserve, and gave Shiite students and those who are loyal for certain parties much higher marks, but it will not make us dislike each other, what happened made us even more determined to be important people in the future, so that Iraq will be lead by clever, educated , and respectful Iraqis, who don't part or treat people differently...
All I want to say is Saddam's unfairness is better than your mercy.


At 11:22 PM, Blogger Laura said...

I am so sorry that this has happened to you and your fellow students. You do yourself and your family proud, though, with your honorable response to this oppression: not to hate; not to allow prejudice to fester in your heart; to love justice and honor all the more. Sunshine, Iraq--and the world--are lucky to have you in it and I am glad I live in the same era as you.

At 5:18 AM, Blogger Ray-Ray said...

I'm so sorry, honey.
I still totally believe that you will overcome this obstacle too and go on to do great things for your country!!!

At 6:03 AM, Blogger dancewater said...

This is horrible, Sunshine, and I don't know what to say.... except that corruption is a big part of what war brings to a country and it's people.

At 8:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tell them Sunshine and lay it right on the line. Each one of you are equal and deserve what you studied for in such hard times. I wish you all a great future.

At 10:12 AM, Blogger jarvenpa said...

My dear, hold your head high. I know, as do all your readers, how you worked so hard and that you deserve excellent marks.
I am sorry about this unfairness.

At 2:21 PM, Blogger Don Cox said...

I am always puzzled as to why the marks in Iraqi colleges are so high. Her in the UK, 70% is a very good mark. 85% is near genius level. 40% is a pass mark. The average good student would get around 60%.

To get more than 75%, a student would have to show evidence of original thought, not just learning the facts in the textbooks.

At 6:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Last post I defended the KURDS, today I support you. I am so sorry you are experiencing a legal system that is not fair. Anyone who has followed your blog knows that you have focused on school and your studies rather than sitting back and blaming your surroundings as a reason why not to study. Your energy, fire and will power to better Iraq is the reason why the officials suppress talented people like you with an honest agenda. Keep Safe! JMR

At 11:54 PM, Blogger Bill said...

Hi Sunshine
Ohh the heat from your words are giving my face a sun tan :)

Please accept my wisdom when I say scores and such, are meaningless.

Did you study and sacrifice long hours to gain a score??

Superior knowledge of a subject is the power to take you wherever you wish to go. It's the one with superior knowledge who will end up paying the wages of those who spend there time acquiring degrees.

"On the whole, it is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them."
- Mark Twain's Notebook, 1902-1903

At 1:52 AM, Anonymous Roy said...

This is very bad news. I have read your blog since the beginning and know how hard you have worked and studied. Because I have followed you I feel that you will overcome any obstacle anybody tries to put in front of you. You are strong and won't let something like a politician slow you down. It won't be easy but nothing has been for you. Stay strong. You are the Sun.

At 6:35 AM, Blogger Average American said...

Your politicians are a pack of disgusting cheats, thugs, and crooks. I hope people remember this display of boorish behavior the next time they go to vote. At what age can you vote in Iraq? You and your fellow students must be old enough or close to it by now.

At 7:14 PM, Blogger Kate said...

I am so sorry, this is horrible. Stay positive Sunshine, even when it's hard.

I just read your interview with I Heart Daily - and I think you are an amazing girl. Good luck! Love your blog :)

xoxoxox kate

At 7:16 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I read about your blog in the Iheartdaily newsletter. I love learning about different cultures. What is happening in Iraq is devestating sad. but stay strong. I like your blog:) and I plan to continue following it. You have also inspired me to start my own blog. when I am put in a bad situation... then, I read something like this and I realize how much worse it could be. You sound like a strong girl. stay that way. you just might end up changing the world.

At 5:19 AM, Anonymous T said...

You are so brave for starting this blog. Bless you. If you need some amazing music to listen to search Spring Awakening.

At 8:59 PM, OpenID ariyathe said...

Oh Sunshine, I just spent 3 hours crying over a lost exam. But my situation comes nowhere close to yours. I understand how you feel. This is horrible! Politicians should first understand to leave our generation, the students, alone. After all, we're the ones that will be taking care of them as they lie on their deathbeds. We're the ones that need to pull ourselves and our country up by the straps. We're the ones that tomorrow depends on after they kill off today. I really like the last line of your entry. Stay strong. Don't accept their mercy and instead, retaliate with your strength- your books, your knowledge and your thoughts that cannot be marred by useless numbers and such. Keep working hard and keep smiling!

At 12:46 PM, Blogger Ripama said...

Sunshine...There's no way to cure the sadness and disappointment you feel, but you must "live strong".

The world is unfair in so many ways. Even at my age I get surprised by what lengths and extremes people use to deny someone that which they've earned.

I don't understand how things work in Iraq, so I won't make any suggestions. I just hope you can overcome this disappointment and continue on your chosen path.

At 6:22 PM, Anonymous Pete O said...

Sunshine it looks like your doing all the right things to get to where you want to be in life. It is great to see that you have the ambition and drive to be successful and are really striving to do your best. Keep up the good work!

At 3:03 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My name is actually Haley and am eleven. Even at my
young age, I can still see how horrible that is. And what with all the fighting and chaos, that must be tough. I hope Iraqi government sees what you said about them.
If they do, I would hope they wouldn't become angry.
I hope you are a ray of sunshine inside all of this.

At 3:29 AM, Blogger isabizzy829 said...

This is absolutely outrageous, I am so sorry. Thank you SOO much for sharing your story and with the world and helping to clear Iraqi stereotypes.You r definetly an inspiration.

At 5:16 AM, Blogger madtom said...

"Before war, there weren't any differences between Shiites and Sunnis, actually I didn't even know to which cast do I belong to!"

Strange thing to hear from people that profess to know history? Apparently not your own

You can read the last few post at Eye Raki to catch up.

At 3:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm very sorry. I could never handle all of that as well as you. you have put great things in my heart.

At 8:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am so sorry...thoughh i'm iraqi too!
I still can't believe this is happenning.
im going to tell my parents to read this and see how they react.
BTW i make dolma and tuka and all of those stuff like kuba and zata and clecha.
keep looking on the upside and never forget we dont know what youre going through so NO-ONE can EVER describe how it feels except for you.
my name is tania nissan and I dont even know how you feel.
keep blogging so that i can keep up on your everyday lifee.
Dont worry everything ill be okaayy :D

-TaniahLicious; <3.

At 7:59 AM, Blogger Realists said...

Hi Sunshine,
I am the Editor of REAL magazine, a mag written by young women from across the world. I would love for you to contribute someting...about your life and growing up in Iraq.
I am from Australia. My email is and you can view Issues 1-3 of REAL online at
I hope to hear from you soon,

At 7:24 PM, Anonymous Alexandra Danielle said...

I just cannot believe that! I had never thought of something like that ever happening. It's just mean! But you are so strong to go through all this, and I am lucky to be able to see just a little bit of you life. Now, when you change the world, I'll know even someone like you started as just a girl. Thank You

At 11:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow. thats unbelievable, and so disgusting. u guys really deserve justice, and i know somebody like you can. hearing this stuff makes me greatful i live in a great country. :)


Post a Comment

<< Home