Days of My Life

Talk about daily life of a teenage girl in Iraq, and days of suffering and success. My nick name will be Sunshine..

Friday, November 28, 2008

Alive with dead spirit..

Dear friends .. It has been unbelievably hard week, I was about to loose control of my study and mind ! .. Last weekend, I was planning to write a shared post with Baghdad dentist, we were chatting at noon, and a dreadful explosion happened, it was the loudest one I've ever heard, I put the laptop a side and ran to my sister who was creaming "something hit my head" she was actually under the curtain I carried her she was unable to stand and crying, I started to cry then both of us fall and I carried her again and reached the corridor almost crawling! suddenly she fainted I got panicked, I sat on the floor and started to examine her head and neck to see if she fainted because of an injury, my dad was taking a shower at that time, and my neighbor was in our house , dad kicked the door several times till the door was opened (because of the blast dad couldn't open the door easily), he came up running and yelling " are you ok? " We were unable to go to the kitchen to bring her water because of the heavy shooting and random bullets, grandma brought water from the nearby bathroom, showered her on her face and finally my sister woke up I kept hugging her, I was so afraid, but she's well expect small scratches on her arm caused by the glass.. My neighbor left our home quickly while the bullets were falling everywhere likes rain, because her old mom was home alone. We spend the first hour looking at our house and possessions feeling strongly thankful for being alive, and extremely in pain to see the house we love damaged like that, we kept thanking god for saving us, when I started to walk in the house and see what has happened, I stated to shake, I was thinking if we were in other places of the house, we would be injured now, or even not alive, but then I started to think reasonably and said "what hits me wasn't suppose to miss me, and what misses me wasn't suppose to hit me", I have faith in god, and I know he is watching and saving us, that's why I feel positive even in the hardest times, and I know everyone will face his/her destiny no matter what, but even though I sometimes almost loose hope and my optimizing spirit .. Anyway, we started to clean and fix the house, at 11 pm I was unable to stand, we all slept in one room, freezing, afraid, and upset of course, but feeling grateful for being alive.. In the next day I woke up early to participate in fixing the house, also my relatives came to help, I had two lectures couldn't postponed them because we didn't have mobile phone services at all, my teacher tried to teach me, but I wasn't concentrating well, I was so tired beside the hammer and drill sounds, it was so hard to hear each other, I reached a point that I was going to cry, what should I do? I am doing my best to concentrate and study well, but the hard circumstances I face makes it so hard if not impossible to do so.. When the lecture was over, and the teacher was leaving, I tried to open the door for her but if was locked, I tried several times, then started to kick it, but it didn't work !! both of my teacher and I started to kick it but the blast caused a huge warp!! My mom went from the other side pushed it and it was finally opened!! Although my mom asked me not to help them and study but I couldn't, first there was so much noise, and secondly I wasn't in a good mood to study well!! Many relatives visited us, they couldn't believe that we are safe !! At noon my other teacher arrived I opened the door carrying a broom! .. at that night I couldn't sleep, I suffered from insomnia, and I had a lecture at 8 am ! But I actually did well!!! On Sunday I went to school without studying anything although I had two exams, and tons of homework (I didn't do well), but I took the Monday off , I had to postponed two exams , and stayed home to do my past days homework... We spent 5 days fixing the house, and then the terrorists informed the neighbors not to fix the houses as there'll be another explosion, I felt so mad, what drove my crazy was to know the terrorist who caused the explosion didn’t get killed!! This explosions destroyed many houses, killed 6 people, and injured at least 36, some of the neighbors are staying in the emergency room, I hope they'll recover.. I'll leave you with the pictures now:

the windows' glass ruined our new curtains

my sister kept crying when her favorite toy was broken !

the house was in such a messI pray we'll have a peaceful life, and free country, I also hope that the terrorists won't cause another explosion…


At 10:15 PM, Blogger BAGHDADENTIST said...

dear sunny,
thanks god for everything,you are alive with alive alive alive spirit,you are a great and a brave girl im aproud of. never ever give up "that's your logo" and you said "what hits me wasn't suppose to miss me, and what misses me wasn't suppose to hit me" so keep up with your great alive spirit.
dont be astonished because the terrorists were not killled at that blast. always the innocents are the victims.
i always ask god to end all this and i believe it will end soon or later.
wish you luck and dont give a chance for a terrorist to delay or influence your study.
may god guard you and your family.

At 12:51 AM, Blogger Manuel said...

Just a few days ago i started reading your blog. This is actually your second post since you startet.
It is an incredible intensive experience that i have reading what your live is like. More people should read it to learn how thankful they should be for their safe life. I am happy that noone of you was badly injured. What a frightening time

At 4:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


I am so very proud of you for your trust in God.

Is Mariam alright? I worry so much about her since you said she became unconscious. Maybe she did have head injuries. I hope that she is alright.

Since we can not trust our police and military to protect our people from the terrorists it looks like our good innocent men will have to start shooting the terrorists before they can set up the explosives that are causing so much damage to homes and death to people.

Stay strong Sunshine we are proud of your courage and trust in God.

At 9:02 AM, Blogger Dancewater said...

I just cried when I read this. I don't even know what to say anymore, but I am very sorry that this is happening to you and your family. It is so unfair!

At 12:03 PM, Blogger Marshmallow26 said...

Dear Sunshine,

I don't know what to say any more, the situation is becoming worse and worst as we move on! How many times have you been through this tragedy?? Is it fair for you and for us to suffer from this shitty situation on daily basis??!!!

God be with dear


At 6:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

how can I comment? how can I imagine what you are going through?
Just keep going, thank Allah everyone is ok.
Keep on at the profs. you were meant to study. take care.

At 9:46 PM, Blogger rose said...

I couldn't stop my tears.I pray to God to protect you and the whole family.I miss you a lot.

At 4:58 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am sorry. I hope you and your family stay safe.

At 10:17 AM, Blogger Rosemary Welch said...

Dear Sunshine, I am so angry on your behalf at those evil parasites, and I am extremely happy that you are still alive. I hate that this has happened to you. You do not hurt anyone. I pray for God to keep protecting your whole family and you. It must be very difficult to do, but please do well in school. You have such a beautiful spirit, it could never die! :)

At 6:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Looks like the bomb did lots of damage to your house. Thank God that your family didn't get hurt. How you can go to school under those conditions and still get good grades is beyond me. I don't know how you do it. You must be a VERY strong girl.

At 12:50 AM, Blogger John said...

I am so sorry, Sunshine! I hope you will all be safe. I am very glad your sister was not seriously hurt. All I can do is pray.

At 12:53 AM, Blogger John said...

P.S. You're very strong and you're NOT going to lose your mind.

At 6:49 AM, Blogger Emily A. said...

You are amazing. I admire your faith and your courage. You are an awesome person. I also believe God is protecting you and your family. You have a mission to perform, and He will protect you until that mission is fulfilled. God be with you.

At 4:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi, Sunshine. I am a nineteen-year-old girl in Brazil and I have found your blog while I was doing a project to my College. I will an English teacher, and I wanted to prove in my work that English is important not only for us to travel to England and stuff like that, but for us to have contact with people from all over the world. That is so cool! I am here in Brazil, living a completely different life from yours, in a completely different culture, and I know what you feel i the other side of the world.
I read a piece of one of your posts to my course classmates, and everybody got like: "Oh, so that is what a teenager from Iraq lives and feels! And we are here, worried with our tests, with the sun shining above us."
That's what the internet is for, to contact us not only with the small community we live at, but with the entire world.

At 7:06 PM, Blogger annie said...

your spirit isn't dead Sunshine, i can tell by how you still carry on and struggle to study and have faith. you are very brave with a very strong spirit.

i pray for you and your family and iraq to find peace and joy.

At 7:28 AM, Blogger attawie said...

Oh Dear Sunshine,

حمدا لله على سلامتكم

Glad you're all safe and sorry you had to go through that. InshaAllah soon we'll have a free, safe Iraq where we can at least live normally.

I keep looking at the photos and thank god you're fine. they remind me of our home when Burij Saddam was bombed. the only safe glass at our home was the windows of my room.

Take care of yourself and your study. stay safe

At 6:19 PM, Blogger Sunshine said...

Aunt rose, i can't stop my tears also, i miss you soooo much, i hope we'll spend next Eid with each other in Iraq. i love you so much..


At 12:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Eid Sunshine,

I too was so very happy to see aunt Rose's comment. First I have heard from her in a long time. It's time for her baby's birthday isn't it? 3 years old, wow.

Thank BAGHDADDENTIST too. His comments pretty well reflect all of our feelings.

We all admire you greatly and hope for peace in your city and country.

I pray for God to protect you every day.

At 4:23 PM, Blogger Grandpa said...

Never ever Give up!!! Love you,

At 4:27 PM, Blogger Grandpa said...

Never ever Give up!!! Love you,

At 7:25 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

this have really reminded me of many things and it tought me many others too, obviously your a very brave person, you have fath in god and your strong too.
i've been in a situation like that before, im from palestine actually. but anyway, the way you have expressed your feelings and shared it in this blog really makes me think, and even to the point where i feel like im in almost the same place as you were.
may god be with all of us,
god is watching and he doesnt forget about innocents and true believers.
free iraq/free palestine!

At 10:59 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

dear Sunny,
I am sorry for wat u all r suffering in Iraq.
I am an Arabian girl frm libya.we live safe here, but our souls n hearts are so sad 4 what we see n hear.. starting from what is happeneing in Palestine to the frightening life u r living in Iraq..
you are a very brave strong spirit.
keep up with what u r doing girl. coz you r representing all teens in ur age who just want to have a normal life not just in Iraq but around the world...
regards to all ur family..
God protect you..

At 10:59 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

dear Sunny,
I am sorry for wat u all r suffering in Iraq.
I am an Arabian girl frm libya.we live safe here, but our souls n hearts are so sad 4 what we see n hear.. starting from what is happeneing in Palestine to the frightening life u r living in Iraq..
you are a very brave strong spirit.
keep up with what u r doing girl. coz you r representing all teens in ur age who just want to have a normal life not just in Iraq but around the world...
regards to all ur family..
God protect you..

At 5:01 PM, Blogger liquid skin said...

dear sunshine
this is terrible.Am very saddened by this.It is awfully tragic to see innocent people being killed.I am from india and we have suffered too. The recent terror attacks in Mumbai killed 200 people and more than 400 were injured. lets pray to have a peaceful and better world. Hope Terrorism stops. Have a safe life.



At 7:22 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


I just finished reading a book called A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini. It is about two teenaged girls in Afghanistan. I highly recommend the book if you get a chance to read it after school lets out.

I understand the author has written another book, also about Afghanistan, called The Kite Runner. Now I want to read that one.

At 1:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stay safe, you and your family and most of all don't ever let anything or anyone break your wonderful spirit. My prayers are with you and every innocent victim.

At 1:19 AM, Blogger Jhondie said...

I'm glad that you and your family are safe. I'm starting to question the competence of the American and Iraqi soldiers in your city. It sounds like these bad guys are very active. That's the easiest kind of enemy to neutralize. I can totaly understand why Iraqis want the American's to leave. If they can't stop the terrorists, then what good are they? I pray that you guys get more competent help and soon. Till then please stay safe.

At 5:01 AM, Blogger Dancewater said...

Eid Mubarak - to you and your family.

May peace come.

At 5:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i hope you are enjoying eid with your family.

i'm thinking of you.

At 5:43 AM, Blogger Mary said...


I am praying for your and your family. I'm so sorry you have to live in a war torn country but am glad that no one in your house was injured seriously.

Stay as safe as you can.

At 5:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Sunshine,

Never give up. You are wonderful.


The Universe

At 12:38 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sunshine, I am glad to hear that nobody was injured, but saddened to see all of the damage. I can only pray that the peace that seems to be breaking out in the rest of iraq will make its way to your corner of the world VERY quickly.

On another note, a friend of your got a medal from the president recently...maybe he already told you. I thought maybe seeing it could cheer you up some.

At 3:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

How many times has your house been damaged by bombs?

At 9:22 PM, Blogger Sunshine said...

Hello All, thank you so much for the encouraging comments ..
Anonymous, my house has been damaged very badly by car bombs and lorry bombs for 7 times ..
But a lot mines exploded and sometimes they break our windows...


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